Thursday, September 4, 2008

Well, to be honest with ya...

This is a phrase I hate to hear from people. Like I would prefer them to not be honest with me. Like, they have been honest with up until that point?? Salesmen seem to be the worst about using this phrase and only use it to appear as though you and him are on the same page. But it is not only used in the sales realm. I tend to hear it a lot at work also. "Well, to be honest with you, I don't agree with it, but that's the direction the company is going." Yes you do, you just don't want to be part of the group that gets blamed. Parents and friends also use this phrase when talking about others as well. "Well to be honest with you, I never liked that (preacher, teacher, BF, ex, boss, coworker) anyways" you say after returning from lunch with them or being seen with said person.

But wait, it can go to a higher level. There is a phrase that goes to a new diva level. "Well to be brutally honest with ya,..." Does anyone need to have you be brutally honest with you? The answer is YES. Sometimes people need a kick in the butt, a slap in the face or a reality check. Call it what you want, just do not say "to be honest with you". And there are times when I am more than happy to be brutally honest with someone, but the problem there is that people can't handle honesty. They want you to make them feel good, want you to agree with them, to join their cause or be the victim with them. There is a saying in the triathlon community, an acronym actually. HTFU. It means "HARDEN THE F UP".

Now I am not telling the people hearing the "to be honest with ya" line, but to the people that deliver such a quip. Harden up and say what you mean, when you mean it. It doesn't have to be delivered with a harsh tone, or to be demoralizing, but honesty is a good thing. You might not agree with my post, and you might think this post sucks, but to be honest with ya.....

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